I Dare You to Drink the Vinegar

As I sit here, on my third of four night shifts, worrying about if I am going to be able to get my car out of the parking lot in the morning as I watch the snowfall  I am thinking about how huge and physically uncomfortable I am 36 weeks and 3 days into my pregnancy. I am thinking about how I cannot wait for this baby to emerge into the world. Interestingly, I am also think about how inspired I am feeling about the possibilities that lie ahead in my professional future as I am slowly closing in on finishing my final three courses in my Master of Nursing degree. Perhaps the most intriguing and applicable course I am taking this semester is a Leadership course because I am finding that am just now coming to an understanding of what good leadership is and the realization that I didn't really have a good grasp on the concept until I began reading about it this week. In the quiet of night shift I am finding the time to ponder my roles and responsibilities as a baccalaureate prepared R

My biggest pet peeve about being a casual nurse is that I am never quite sure if I am doing what I am supposed to be doing. I have had 2 casual jobs (4 if you count the two orientations that I did at BC Children's Hospital that I never picked up any shifts for) since I began my nursing career in 2008. My first casual position was on the inpatient acute psychiatric unit at Royal Columbian Hospital in New Westminster. I began in 2010, picked up my first shift in 2011, and only did that one shift before I decided that the level of anxiety that I felt walking into that shift was not worth me taking anymore. My second casual position, with Coast Mental Health in the concurrent disorders transitional housing, began in September 2011. This position is not terribly anxiety-inducing, yet I still ask myself every shift, is this really all I'm supposed to be doing? Every shift I work I look around the tiny medication room that I find myself stuck in for 8 hours thinking there must be